Friday, February 1, 2013

Another dumb bible story!

Anyone who has ever taken the time to read the bible in its entirety will attest to the myriad of stupid and nonsensical tales contained within its covers. I have stated often that a sin is only a sin when God says it's a sin. The bible is chock full of examples where God makes exceptions to a former commandment or prohibition when it suits his so called divine purposes. The biblical deity reminds me of a mob boss who doesn't personally get his hands dirty, but instead leaves all of the dirty work to his henchmen. God has gotten his hands dirty but some times for some reason, he prefers to use his henchmen; the Hebrews.


4. “You shall not make for yourself an idol in the form of anything in heaven above or on the earth beneath or in the waters below. 5.You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God, punishing the children for the sin of the fathers to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me, Exodus 20:4-5

The good Lord was so emphatic about this one that he even repeated it in Deuteronomy 5:8-9! Yet here is where we introduce the stupid tale that demonstrates quite clearly how oftentimes God makes exceptions to his own rules. You can find our tale in the book of Numbers 21:4-9 but before that we must look at what led to this particular circumstance. In Numbers 21:4-5 the Israelites were weary of wandering in the desert and complained about being brought out of Egypt to die in the desert. They were also tired of eating the same old food that God was miraculously providing them and their ungratefulness apparently incited the wrath of God.

The Lord responded to the protests of his beloved chosen: "Then the Lord sent venomous snakes among them; they bit the people and many Israelites died." Numbers 21:6 That's right folks the good Lord had yet another one of his immature hissy fits and killed "many Israelites." That's like having your 5 year old child tell you that he is tired of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and would like macaroni and cheese instead, and you respond by choking the life out of him! Not good nor morally correct for us to behave that way, but apparently if you are a theist it's perfectly fine that God acts in a similar manner.

When the people repent of being foolish enough to piss off God, they ask Moses to pray on their behalf so that the serpents be taken out of their midst. Moses does as has been requested and instead of God just magically making the serpents disappear he has Moses violate the second commandment:

4. “You shall not make for yourself an idol in the form of anything in heaven above or on the earth beneath or in the waters below. 5.You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God, punishing the children for the sin of the fathers to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me,... (repeating this text here on purpose for emphasis)

He instructs Moses to make a bronze snake and raise it on a pole so that when someone is bitten by the serpents when they looked to the snake on the pole they would live and recover. Numbers 21:8-9. I wonder how long it took Moses to make a snake out of bronze and how many others died while they waited for it to be completed and endowed with the healing powers of God. What most believers don't know unless they have read the bible is what eventually happened to that bronze snake.

The bronze snake was eventually destroyed by King Hezekiah according to 2 Kings 18:4
 

He removed the high places, smashed the sacred stones and cut down the Asherah poles. He broke into pieces the bronze snake Moses had made, for up to that time the Israelites had been burning incense to it. 

You read right! King Hezekiah had to destroy the serpent because apparently it became an object of worship for the Israelites. My problem is that if God is omniscient as the bible claims he is then did he not see this coming? If he didn't then he is not omniscient as is demonstrated many times in the scriptures in other tales. The simplest solution to this plague of poisonous serpents would've been simply to make them disappear or go away. But of course God for some reason did not think of this.

 Note: All biblical quotations are taken from the New International Version.

1 comment:

  1. You've done your homework. Wow. I like it. Keep up the good work.

    ReplyDelete